Friday, December 30, 2011

Rules of Prey by John Sandford

Rules of Prey (Lucas Davenport, #1)Rules of Prey by John Sandford

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


I've been on a mystery/thriller kick. I'm currently reading through Robert B. Parker's Spenser series, Janet Evanovich's number series (They just made a movie out of One for the Money, due out on January 27th). And so I picked up John Sandford's first book to sort of round out my reading rotation. I was excited to discover that there is a movie on this series too with Mark Harmon (from NCIS as Gibbs), playing Lucas Davenport. So I'll definitely be checking that out...

On to my review. Lucas Davenport plays a cop in Minneapolis who is hunting down a serial killer who calls himself Maddog. He has a numbered list of rules he leaves with every woman he's killed. Rules he lives by in order to not get caught. So ensues the chase of cat and mouse typical to every story in this genre with the good guy winning.

Of course that's not why we read the book, is it? We know how it will end.

We read to book to find out if we LIKE the character we will spend the next umpteen hours inside their head as we escape from our own lives to follow his / her chase for the bad guy. We evaluate their choices from our own, what lines we would, and they do cross. We read to find out if the author can really pull the magic trick of making us feel like we are really there. Can they engage all our senses, can they make our hearts race, can they pull us into specific moments and transform our humdrum for their fantastic? THAT is what takes us from the first to last page. Otherwise it's just a procedural, right?

In my assessment, this book does a fair job of that. Especially for his first book sold. It's a solid read that doesn't disappoint. But there is a niggling question of "Do I LIKE the character?"

Lucas Davenport is touted to be intelligent, a problem solver. But I honestly don't find the character to be very honorable. He's a womanizer who also takes the law into his own hands and covers up his own crimes. He irresponsibly gets one woman pregnant, and sets up another woman who is throwing herself at him to be bait for the bad guy. (She catches on and goes with it because she's a media hound herself but the fact that he sets her up without her consent or knowledge is still out there). Meanwhile he has another affair with a witness that he has tucked away in his upstate cabin. I don't like him. He has no honor. AND he's a game player who chooses to use other people as pawns for everything from catching a murderer to warming his bed. Oh yeah, and he's a professional game inventor, which sounds cool as long as you have your own set of rules to live by too, separating fact from fiction, you know?

I realize that every character needs an arc, a place to begin that he grows from. I get that, and will likely read a few more to find out if any of those bad choices he made in the first book have the kinds of consequences that will provoke change in future books. If not, I'll look for another series to pick up.

As for the quality of the book itself, it will keep you turning the pages - even though you know who the bad guy is early on.

I gave it three stars for now. I'll wait for more stars as I read further into the series.



View all my reviews

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

A Christmas Reflection ~or~ The Ties That Bind

Picture of Megs and Max taken last year
during a romp in the snow.
While trying to peel apart the filters to make coffee, Max, our dog, went into a seizure while eating his breakfast. I'd just given him his morning pill with a dish of kibbles to chase it down - suddenly water and dog food are flying everywhere. 

So, upside? 

That mopping I didn't get to while prepping for Christmas dinner - is now done.  The snow we didn't get for Christmas is cheerfully falling now and Max is licking himself like a cat to clean up - even though we've rubbed him down with snow and cleaned him up.  Well, Megan did while I was mopping.  She tells me they had a snowball-catch game while they were at it.  My only wish is that I had pictures of the happy chaos outside.  (Picture above was from last Feb.)

My epilepsy-worry over the puppy is eclipsed a bit by the now clean dog, clean floor and snowball flight of the morning, and I sit down in my chair with a cup of fresh coffee to spend some of my morning with you. 

Christmas day was spent with Mom, Dad and Nate.  It was really nice having them over, though we missed Stacey and Stew - who just got engaged a few days ago.  (Congrats to them!).  They are planning on getting married some time this coming year.

It was a themed sort of Christmas this year.  Most of the kids were given gifts that let them explore their creative side.  We have a model car, rug hooking, and yarn with crochet hooks, needles and looms.  Now we all know how to cast on and do one-stitch in knitting, (it sort of went viral) Jessica has made several hats (amazingly good ones with a built-in cuff) and I foresee many pot holders and scarves in our future.


All good. 

It's the sort of thing you do side by side with someone while you talk or watch movies together.  There's one project going around that I've seen at least three people pick up and work on for a while and set down where it waits for the next person to put a few more rows on.  Even Bill learned how, so he could teach Jess.  She was getting frustrated and he wanted to decode the directions and help her learn by watching.  For him it was like a puzzle to solve.

He looked at me and said how he couldn't believe he was doing it.  It's not something he'd ever had an interest in learning how to do.  Ever.  And I smiled back at him and told him that his interest wasn't in knitting, it was in his daughter.  That man LOVES.  He's got the knack of it.  When they all were in a play one year, he did tech work behind the curtain, just so he could be near them.  That's the kind of man he is.  I've never known anyone like him.

We celebrated Christmas a day later with Mark and Robin.  Rebekah was with us for the day too (her car was getting fixed nearby and we were a happy landing place since we've been trying to make our schedules work to get together anyhow, love that lady!).  So when it was time to go over there, we dragged her along with us. 

We went to their new apartment and had pizza and a movie and exchanged gifts.  Robin has the place feeling like home with pictures hung everywhere, and Mark's got his movie posters mingled in with all the Christmas lights.  My favorite is the "Marvel Wall" of all the block-buster movies based on comics that have come out in the last few years.  Mina has had another hair cut since I saw her last, and the chickie feather, fly-away, hair that she used to have is gone.  It's coming in thicker and has body and a bit of swing to it.  Combine that with her legs getting longer and her vocabulary growing... *sigh*  She's growing out of that toddler phase and into a bright and inquisitive little girl.  Time is passing too quickly!  I'm so caught up in the active business that is happening in my own house and I miss seeing the changes in my granddaughter. 

It was a really wonderful Christmas, and I am blessed. 

Sometimes life is hard, sometimes it's easier to focus on the negative things.  The first-thing-in-the-morning-mess to clean up.  The nagging worry of a sick puppy that you can't fix.   Time speeding faster than you'd like.  The snow or rain that falls every time the roofers are supposed to come, and how you are going to pay to keep a roof over your kids heads.  The hundred other worries and expectations that dangle in my vision but aren't mentioned here...

I don't know where you are at, reader.  I don't know what kinds of joys and stresses orbit you, but I do know that how we approach them changes everything.  Do you come at life with a closed fist?  Are you so weighed down with worries and bitterness and resentment that your hands are too full to accept the joy and peace and love that are in front of you? 

We cling to what we know.  Those things we cling to, define us, because we mold our lives around them.

My Christmas wish for you, is that you would know Jesus.  That you would cling to Him and let Him exchange the things that are weighing you down for the good gifts that he offers. 

Thank you for spending part of your day with me, hearing about mine.  I am blessed to have some of you in my life, to know you on a personal level.  For others who have stumbled here from a wider net, thanks for taking the time to read through this long post.  It's time for me to step out of my devotion and journal portion of my day and go on to the next thing. 


Friday, December 23, 2011

A post nano re read... cut a few scenes

I shouldn't have done it.  I should know better than to look back, but since I had set it down to work on NoteBored stuff, I did look back.  In looking back I deleted a scene or two (having decided to take it in a different direction than what I'd started with).  Result?  What I'd left in because of the crazy word-hungry days of Nano, I cut when I'd re read it.  It's only a few scenes though.  Now it looks like my draft less than it was.  And that's because it is, but I'm back to writing.  And it feels so very good!

The break (nano ending) hit in between the first and second portions of the book.  Though I have it set up as an expected 100,000 word story, I strongly suspect that it will be closer to 150,000.  At least in the first draft -  but we'll see.  So much of it is front loaded with back story right now, the next part might go much faster. 

Oh well.  It's late.  Tomorrow will be full of Christmas eve preparation.  We still have shopping and wrapping and cooking to do.  Just like almost everyone one else out there.

Enjoy your Christmas eve, friend.  Slow down long enough to live in your moments, to set the worries, stress and anxiety down long enough to be there with your loved ones. 

Merry Christmas to all and to all... a good night.

Blogging from email...

So I went to the blogger dashboard and explored some of the settings.  One of the settings allows for you to blog from any email program.  So I’m trying it. 

*waves arms wildly while jumping up and down* Can you see me?


You can?  Cool! 

Okay, you can go on with the next thing on your list.  Thanks for checking in with me today.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

The Alchemist

The AlchemistThe Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


I'm in the process of pulling "classic" books that somehow slipped past me in school off the shelf and reading them now that I'm 40-something.

I went looking here at the Goodreads to see what everyone else had to say about it - sort of to get myself in the mood to read something I've thought would be good for me to read but wasn't on a shelf that I normally gravitate to. Turns out that it's a polarizing book. People don't just take it or leave it. They either rave over it or they throw it across the room!

So, I'm curious to see what I will think of it. I'll be back to edit my review and rate it when I'm done.

****

Back.

Well, I think I stand in the middle. I liked the prose, it felt a little over the top in some spots, but part of that is to make up for it's simplicity. I didn't hate it, I wasn't as impressed with it as some were, but I didn't hate it.

I love the economy within the story concerning magic use, that it has a consequence. Mostly because stories that don't have a check and balance - a physics component with the magic doesn't give me enough to hang the suspension of my belief. I enjoyed the exploration between evil and altruism. The play between power and helplessness.

In spite of all that, there wasn't anything here that explained why this tiny book is getting so much excitement over it.






View all my reviews

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

NoteBored, my reach exceeding my grasp?

Louisa May Allcat: Notebored's mascott
My daughter, Megan, asked me today what my favorite quote was.  The first one I always go to when asked that question is part of a poem by Robert Browning "A man's reach should exceed his grasp, else what is heaven for?"  Dictionary.com translates this to mean: (Cultural Dictionary)
 
Words from a poem by Robert Browning, suggesting that, to achieve anything worthwhile, a person should attempt even those things that may turn out to be impossible.

I'm excited for what's coming in January.  NoteBored will return from the ashes, but it's going to function differently than it has in the past.  (Though, the graphic design is more in line with the orginal version.)  This time, instead of paying for server space, domain names and fancy forum software, I'm making better use of free programs that are out there.  All powered by Goggle.

I'm building a website that will act as an umbrella to pull all the other disparate programs offered by google together into one website to enhance our community.  I guess it's my version of a content managment system.

We'll use Groups, as our conversation forum.  I've found a way to nest the website that holds all the group conversations inside one of the pages at NoteBored so that you don't have to go to the groups home web page (a separate url) if you don't want to - but now, because groups is essentially designed to work through e-mail you can easily continue a conversation throughout the course of the day from your data plan pone if you like.  Doing it this way has some limitations, but I've read that google plans to make the "group" program more versatile with the ability to create folders (or categories within your forum) to help keep conversations straight.

Shared Docs will become the meat and potatoes of NoteBored.  To be honest, I still have a bit of a learning curve to  the google docs function and how I want to structure it so that we have less clutter and better results.  But the benefit of using "Docs" as the workshop is that each person retains their own work, since the creator of a document is the owner and has the ability to share or unshare rather than loosing control of a copy that is hosted on another's server space.  And yes, there is a way to pull that inside the NoteBored website too, so that all those documents, and the conversation forum are still under one "roof" contributing to keeping all of us in community. 

Google+ will allow us to put notebored people in a "circle".  From what I can see Google+ is essentially the same as facebook.

Instant messaging and live chat functions are embedded right into the the email program, so you can have private conversations and live conversations while still being part of the community.

Google Calendar is easily embedded into NoteBored as well.  I can create several calendars if I want, and you can look at them stacked on one another or peel them apart and only look at what you want.  For instance, I can create a calendar for scheduled NoteBored activities.  (our virtual Christmas party, flash contests schedule, member birthdays) and another calendar for submission deadlines on various other publications.  It's a powerful program, with such a smooth and clean interface that it looks deceptively simpler than it is.

I can create forms that will allow me to make applications to join the community, and those same forms can be used for moderating writing contests, because they time stamp entries and funnel all the results to one document (a spread sheet).

There's also photo software that will let me publish a directory of sorts, for those in the community who are interested in promoting themselves as authors.  A small picture of themselves with a three or four line bio will ping on search engines and bring their names higher up in a google search - more visibility if you are a struggling writer wanting to make yourself known.

So I look at all these programs, I see how seamlessly the fit together - designed so that they would fit together, (most of which translate well to a mobile device) and wonder, why on earth would I want to pay hundreds of dollars to recreate the same basic thing?

There is a catch though.  There's almost always a catch.  In my case, it means I'm going to have to learn my way around these programs or hunt down a google guru who can help me trouble shoot issues when they arise.  Being able to huddle these programs into one website does not mean that I can problem solve each component.  While I know my way around some of them, I haven't used all of them.  I will need to create some tutorials quite literally while I learn them for myself and pray that I can trouble shoot for others or at least point them in the right direction!

But that is just the actual building of the site... there are other changes coming to NoteBored too.  I'm using the building of a website in order to get to what I'm really after, and that is the building of a community.  Part of doing that means that I have to establish the rules that govern it.  Here's what I mean:

An application  / sponsor form is the first step.  It's my gate keeper.  A typical writer's forum allows anyone to register with the idea that if you offer crits you will get your work critiqued in return.  Many people show up, some are only looking, some are looking for trouble or for ego strokes.  Most abandon the site and you end up with an inflated membership that doesn't reflect your true community.  An application weeds out anyone who isn't seriously interested. 

Also, we are a going to a co-op format and you must have a sponsor to get in.  No worries if you don't have one.  All who are not charter members MUST first be sponsored and then take their turn in sponsoring someone else. 

What does a sponsor do?  First they communicate with the newbie one on one, through whatever means works for them, to show them the ropes on our unusual google programs vehicle for community. 

Second, they are the first ones in line to offer crits for their work and respond to their posts.  A big brother sort of thing to ensure that no one falls through the cracks.  Notice I said "in line?"  This doesn't mean that they will be the only ones to help the newbie with comments, but they will have an advocate from the very beginning. 

After the probationary period is over (when presumeably they've made their own friends in the group and asked the majority of their orientation questions) then they are no longer a newbie and responsible now for taking on a newbie themselves.  Sometimes we will get a lot of newbies, and everyone will have their own.  Or things will be slower and a newbie might be assigned several people to watch out for them.  It all depends.

Code of ethics/conduct Boy this sounds so official and scary!  But it's not.  Mostly it's a document that states really clearly what the expectations are for behavior and the conditions under which we all agree to live by. 

Every community has them no matter if they are spoken or unspoken.  I want ours to be very clear because NoteBored, by design, takes on people of all ages.  We will have young people in our community who will need to be protected and nurtured.  That means that the community will be policed by it's members and the rules enforced, resulting in banning if problem situations cannot be resolved. 

My hope is that we will have enough people in the community that a group of individuals who have marvelous people skills will make this their own passion too.  The idea isn't to be autocratic and demanding but to train up people who are vastly different in age, culture and experience levels to use each other's strengths and make us a strong and diverse community.  But that has to be modeled and it has to be communicated in order to bring peace.  It also takes someone who is willing to hold a firm line in order to protect the integrity of the site and the welfare of the younger ones we've invited.

Editorial board eventually we will want a place to publish our community work.  We aren't there yet, and I won't be the one at the steering wheel for it, but hopefully some will rise from our ranks who have this passion and will help mold what it will look like.  Will we have an Ezine?  An Anthology?  A chapbook? I can't wait to find out!

Officers.  I touched on this a little, but I'll go into better detail here.  The idea of having officers within the community is so that specialization can push our boundaries outwards while maintaining structure within.  No one person can do it all.  I need people who are really, really good at the things I'm not, in order for this dream to become a reality. 

  • I need administrators to help as gatekeepers, run forums, assign sponsorships and such. 
  • I need a google guru team that can help us over the tech hurdles.  
  • I need security officers who will resolve conflicts that arise.
  • I need mentors and moderators to help newbies in the art of writing. 
  • I need more experienced writers who relentlessly pursue excellence in their writing, and challenge others to do the same. 
  • I need an event team that will facilitate for the community in things such as: conventions, contests, deadlines, reunions, lectures. 
  • I need a community oriented team who will promote fun like word games, virtual parties and those who welcome the stranger. 
  • I need reporters who will write articles about us to the writing community at large and articles that are about all those other arms inside our community I just talked about, who can keep us all connected.


Once your sponsorship has ended and you have served at least one term in sponsoring another, AND you have served for a time on one of those teams I just spoke about (in apprenticeship) you are eligible for... 

Elections.  Wouldn't it be awesome if we had so many people contributing to make this community operate - and so many people who wanted to serve, that we had to have elections to keep it from being an insider's clique? 

So now I come full circle, and I ask this humbling question: Is my reach exceeding my grasp?  Am I dreaming too big?  Am I setting myself up for failure assuming that more people will want this too, that they will indeed catch my vision and help carry the load into the future? 

This is a consumer-driven society that craves instant satisfaction, sound bytes, texting short-cuts and fluff.  We like things to come easy, and building this kind of community takes WORK.  It takes commitment to other people in order for it to function the way I envision it; rich in the building up not just NoteBored's corporate functionality - but into the lives of individuals, helping them find their own voice and encouraging them to use it!  Can you see it too?  Can you envision a small community in a little corner of the web, committed to enabling people to communicate their thoughts and ideas clearly?  Do you see the power it?

The word was spoken, and the world began.

The word became flesh, and lived among us, using stories to convey the vision of the kingdom of heaven.

We were made in His image, designed so that we crave communication and fellowship, ...stories.

Stories are what bind us together.  You see it everywhere from the drawings on caves, telling stories of hunts and families - to facebook and it's new timeline profile, telling the electronic version of an individuals story.

I'm afraid that in our race for instant communication on a global level (twitterspeak, facebook, texting, IM'ing), we've forgotten how to really communicate.

Is my reach exceeding my grasp?  Maybe.  But my desire to reach out and build into another individual, helping them find their voice and explore platforms from which to speak is just as powerful for me on my end is it is for them on theirs.  It's not just the art of writing I am interested in.  If that were so, then I wouldn't bother trying to create a community, I'd just keep submitting my work and focus on my own skills.  But I get such pride and excitement out of watching the people I helped build into on a personal level or offered critiques on their work, get published; knowing that NoteBored was instrumental in their growth. 

This is my vision, that far-off thing I am reaching for.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Dea's Pasta Salad

Here are the ingredients:

1 pkg. Noodles (bowtie, macaroni, shells, etc.)
1 pkg. Diced Ham (cooked)
1 Pepper (Green, yellow, red or orange)
1 onion, diced
1 sm. pkg. frozen peas
1 sm. can sliced black olives
1 tbs of garlic
1 sm. tomato
1/2 cup diced carrot
3 TBS of Parmesan cheese
1 cup shredded cheese
1/2 bottle of italian dressing
1/4 bottle of ranch dressing

Cook the noodles till they are just done, don't over-cook.  While the noodles are still in the strainer, run cold water over them to cool and to rinse off any lingering starch.

Return to pan and add all the diced ingredients and the dressings.  Then add most of each of the cheeses and stir them into the mixture, saving a little back to sprinkle over the top.

Feel free to make substitutions with the dressings (regular or low cal) or vary how much you use.  You don't want the noodles to clump, so you'll want enough oil to coat them, but beyond that it's more a matter of how dry or moist you prefer the salad to be.


Here's the nutrition break-down on my version:
Recipe name

Serves people
IngredientsCaloriesCarbsFatProtein
Kroger - Diced Ham - Fully Cooked, 1 container (2 cups ea.)2408636Ico_delete
Great Value (Walmart) - Rotini Noodles, 1 container (6 cup dries ea.)1,680328856Ico_delete
Onions - Raw, 1 large631501Ico_delete
Bell Peppers - Yellow, Raw, 1 pepper (186 g/3.75" long, 3" diameter)501202Ico_delete
Peas - Green, frozen, unprepared, 1 package (10 oz)21939115Ico_delete
Kroger - Olives, Ripe, Black -Sliced, 1 container (8 tbsp ea.)1004100Ico_delete
Gilroy Farms - Minced Garlic In Water, 2 tsp10200Ico_delete
Fresh Produce - Cherry Tomatoes-Raw, 5 ounces35611Ico_delete
Carrots - Raw, 0.5 cup, chopped26601Ico_delete
Cheese - Parmesan, grated, 3 tbsp65146Ico_delete
Kraft Natural Shredded Cheese - *Colby & Monterey Jack 2% Milk , 1 cup (28 g)40042028Ico_delete
Condiments - Zesty Italian Dressing, 0.5 container (32 tbsp ea.)88016960Ico_delete
Kraft Salad Dressing - Ranch Dressing/Dip, 0.25 container (32 tbsp ea.)52012520Ico_delete
Add Ingredient
Total:4288453198146
Per Serving:1721886



Saturday, December 17, 2011

Twitter Confusion

Okay, I admit that I am new to the whole Twitter thing.  To me it feels like a room crammed with people who are shouting at one another.  It's crammed because I did figure out how to "follow" people.  But most of those people I'm following don't know one another, are too famous to follow me back, or are strangers that I've followed because I think there is an etiquette to this and I don't want to do it wrong.  Just because I am listening in on their posts, doesn't mean I am hearing the other side of their conversations. 

So.. I guess it's better to imagine that in this crowded room, everyone is talking on their cell phones... 

In twitterspeak...

full of codes with hash tags...

and links.

Oh! and btw, you can only use 150 characters per post. 

...Including the hash tags and links.

So to make better use of your character limit, everyone uses text abbreviations.

*sigh*

Does this cereal come with a decoder ring?

How is it possible to actually communicate anything this way? 

I write short short stories.  Really short stories.  500 to 1000 word stories.  I can deeply appreciate it when each word carries multiple duties for saying more while using less words.  It makes a story sharp and clean.  But twitter has such a steep learning curve to  decode that it's a lot of work for me to slog through.

This reminds me a lot of when I learned HTML, once you figured out that all the commands were shortened down to initials, and you knew what the initials stood for - the language was easy to understand.  Then you just needed the rules that governed them like how to <open> and </close> them nest them properly like those Russian dolls, so that the text and images landed in the right spot on the page. 

So today I am <rant>ing about it here, and I'll post this link over there - Maybe someone will take pity on my confusion and walk me through how to use the hash tags to stitch a conversation together with someone.

After spending a cramped hour or so on twitter, confused and opening links to unpack comments, it's nice to come here and use as many words as I want to wind my way through the thought process.  I can wriggle my toes in the sand and stretch out on my own beach after surfing the web.   

I feel better now.  Like I've been heard.  After all, you did come here to listen to what I had to say - even if you don't leave me comments.  But please do.  Leave me comments, I mean.  It's nice to have space to talk, but I really would like to have a conversation about this with someone.  Are you a twitter user?  Do you understand it?  Is it a satisfying way of communicating?  Reply to my post and help a girl out!

Thanks for giving me a part of your day.   

</rant> 

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Re Post from August 2011 BBQ with Mark and Robin

BBQ with Mark and Robin

posted Aug 8, 2011 6:33 AM by Deanna Rittinger

2011-07-23

I just uploaded the pictures I took from when we were at Mark and Robin's house.  It was a good time, with good conversations and a nice way to say goodbye to this phase of their lives.  They've made plans to move to Canton (an apartment with clubhouse privileges and a playground for Mina) which will put Mark closer to where he works.  Less rent, less gas to travel back and forth, and they will soon have their car paid off *yay!*  All around it's a good thing.

This is our final week of summer do-what-you-want vacation.  After that we head out to BBI which is a different kind of do-what-you-want, but when we get back the whole school routine picks up and everyone's life will be run by schedule again.

I'm in the third week of jogging and I've lost 8 pounds (according to the online tracker I'm using, MyFitnessPal) but I'm also courting a knee injury.  I've walked only, not jogged for the last few days and am on a steady diet of Motrin and using ice packs.  No fun... but I'm committed to loosing this weight.  My cholesterol level is scary high and I want to be around to enjoy my grand kids.  Plus, fitting into an outfit where I feel comfortable in tucking in my shirt would be very nice!  

I'm also enjoying the YouVersion online bible study program.  Between the online calorie counter and the online bible study I've got a program, goals and a kind of accountability that is keeping me motivated.  If any of you want to join me in either of these, I think it would be wonderful!

Lastly in my for my note today, I'm plotting out my next novel.  I've told a few of you what it's about and gotten some real positive feedback.  That's cool.  It makes me thrilled to know that you enter into my stories with your attention and excitement.  It an odd sort of way, it seriously feeds me.

I'm not sure why I am so faithful at working on this site.  None of you are reading it.  None of you have used it as a home page or even created your profile page.  I don't know if you are just not interested and don't want to hurt my feelings or if it's just not part of your routines yet.  *sigh*  In any case, it's here for you for when you are ready.
 
12-14-11 Update:
 
It's exciting to me that I've made progress since this entry.  I have 51,000 words written on the novel and to date I've lost 21 pounds. 
 
Mark and Robin are enjoying their new home, and are entering their first winter there.  It's hard having them a bit farther away, we don't see them as much, but It's got to be nice to be able to save so much more in gas.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

My Life's Work

I had started a family web site not too long ago.  I had dreams of it keeping us all connected as the kids all grew up and moved out and started lives of their own.  I had a family calender and a family blog - thinking that we could all post things to a community site that would store it all.  The problem was it didn't "take".  I was the only one there and it remained my own vision.  Part of publishing to a blog is that you are speaking TO someone.  At the other site, I was speaking mainly to myself, out loud in an empty room. 

So I am moving select posts here; ones that are generic enough for friends who wander over from facebook or catch me on the net somehow through a search engine.  This way, when my kids are ready to read what I write and leave behind for them - it will be out here.  I'll migrate the stuff I don't want lost from there, over to here.  While in a sense I'm still talking to an empty room, (not much in the way of comments here) I do so now with the front door open. 

So if you are there at the door, listening in on my day today, what follows is a re post from that other blog.  In fact, it's the very first post from that one.  I was stating my reasons for creating it in the first place. 

It's funny, I just caught myself the other day saying exactly this same thing to Lys.  It was ready to speak because I'd already articulated the thought here in this format.

I'm looking for finding creative ways to use what I know and help those around me - specifically a written record for my kids. I don't know how long God will give me with you guys. Right now I'm healthy (though overweight) and not on any long term medications. This is the only legacy I will be able to leave to you guys, you are my life's work. Leaving written or photographic records is my way of banking something for your future, by establishing a steady past (foundation) to build on.


The rest is up to you. Your choices, your reactions to the things you can't control... all of them will build options and limitations of your own making. You get the credit for what you do with what you are given. If you are successful, it will be because you made the choices and imagined your future with it's goals and dreams, not me


But your past? Your understanding of what common sense is? That is something I have been giving you from the start, intentional parenting, making you my highest priority and life's work.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Unforgiveness


Today was a very scary day for me.  I spoke the truth in love, through a letter.  I chose to do it this way so that they could react first, think second, and respond third.  I went to a person close to me and risked the relationship by telling them the pain that I have been holding on to for way too long.  You see, I realized that by not sharing my problem with this person, I had been stripping them of all the power in the relationship.  They didn’t even know I felt this way, and thereby couldn’t fix it.  I got to keep safe, all wrapped up in my pain, without the risk of being rejected. 

I have hopes that all will turn out well.  I pray for this person, and myself, that we will be a Christ like example of restitution and forgiveness.  I pray that our relationship will be stronger than it was.  It’s hard waiting and wondering what is going on in their mind…I usually prefer to do this sort of thing face to face.  It is easier to see someone’s heart through their expression than through their words. 

Still, I feel God doing a work in me.  The power I was holding on to in my fear, had kept me from experiencing the power of God.

Lord, forgive me for my lack of trust in you.  I have wanted to bring this to you so many times…and in my hurt and insecurities I could not release it, until now.  Regardless of the relationship that I may have lost with this person, I am very grateful that you were patient with me while I struggled with it.

 This was a very painful lesson to learn.  I pray I never forget it.

Monday, December 12, 2011

Unasked for advice from a mother of five

I was at the grocery story today and there was a young mother with two daughters. The older girl was sent to follow the youngest one around the store, riding herd on her while the the littlest one screamed in rebellion at everything. Especially at the older sister “who isn’t the boss of me!” The mother calmly ignored them both, giving me the feeling that this was normal for this family, and continued shopping.
It was distracting and caused a great deal stress for all those in the store.

She didn’t ask my advice. But if she had this is what I would have said.

1. Go in the store with a strategy. Before you are even in that stressful situation, agree what the plan will be by talking with your child ahead of time. Let them know before they enter the store that good behavior will result in something they like. (extra time on the TV, a treat at the check out, more time to play etc.) And bad behavior will result in something they don’t. (No candy at the check out, no horsey ride at Meijers, etc.)

2. Follow through with your plan! Calmly remind them of your deal and what they have to loose if they choose not to listen. Don’t loose your temper.

3. “She didn’t believe me, she’s screaming again, and I’m still in the same boat! Now what do I do?” First, take a deep breath and relax. I expected this. She is used to getting her own way and you are used to giving it to her to keep from making a scene. So? Don’t give it to her.

Pick her up, leave the groceries in the store and return to your car. She doesn’t get to make a scene and force you into letting her have control. (Of course, you don’t get to do your groceries in that moment, but groceries will always be there, and this teachable moment won’t.)

Do NOT let her have a treat or reward her bad behavior.

3. Rinse and repeat. Do this as many times as it takes for her to understand that that behavior won’t be accepted in polite company. Don’t get upset, don’t make threats, don’t shame her, simply remove her from the situation and isolate her in a place that’s neutral territory until she’s gained self control (while you keep yours). Once she has a grip and is calm again you can talk about what happened.

If you get her home and she’s completely lost her cool and melting in a lay-on-the-floor in a kick and scream kind of way, set her in her room and shut the door. It’s a safe place to fall apart. It’s okay to fall apart sometimes, especially when your body has just developed enough to experience complex and powerful emotions. It’s pretty whelming. Screaming and stomping, hitting the pillow, and crying till they are exhausted is okay when they are in their room. They aren’t being punished, they are in their own safe place to learn how to control themselves.

Violent behavior, hitting, destroying the room to try to get back at you is NOT okay. At that point, if your family believes in corporeal discipline, there’s your moment. But use it very sparingly, as a last resort, and even then it should shock them into a change of behavior, not set them off further. Hug them when you are done, making it clear that you will not tolerate the abuse or destruction, but you love them.

If you do not believe in physical discipline, then hold them in your lap with your arms wrapped around them until the violence passes. (This works only when they are tiny, when they get too big it becomes a wrestling match and much harder.)

Here’s the thing. As long as you take responsibility for her emotions, she won’t have to. The idea is to communicate to her that she has the power to have a good day (with shopping, and what ever carrot you use for positive feedback) or a bad day (no shopping, no carrot and possibly time in her room if she can’t keep herself under control) all based on her ability to manage herself.

This frees you up to be her cheerleader! You get to be happy with her when she makes a good decision and behaves well. You can also be sad for her when she makes a bad decision. It doesn’t put you in the place where you have to be the bad guy, because her action is what causes the reaction that she gets. ”I’m sorry we can’t get your gummy bears today, I was really looking forward to it too. Maybe we can try again tomorrow.” And to help her succeed, make sure that you go at a time when she’s less likely to be over-tired.

The most important thing is that you keep giving her opportunities.

It puts you on the same side as her, letting her practice self-control and reaping the consequences. This is a valuable lesson for any child to learn. It’s how the world works. Standing between your child and the consequences doesn’t help them grow. In fact, when you do stand between, it retards their growth and they learn, not how the world works, but how to manipulate you.

And that’s my unasked for advice.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Dea's Chili

This recipe was handed down to me by my mom and dad.  When I told my dad I had a hankering for his chili but didn't know how to make it, he told me "you just open cans, Dee Dee."  So I trusted his word and trusted my sense of taste and kept playing with the seasonings over the years.  It will be wonderful if you take my version and create your own by adding or removing ingredients.  Oh, and invite me over so I can taste it too!

Ingredients:

2 or 3 pounds of browned ground hamburger
2 large onions / diced
1 green pepper / diced
1 large can of Books beans
1 small can of kidney beans
1 small can of black beans
2 or 3 packets of chili seasoning
2 or 3 cans of diced tomatoes
1 TBS of minced garlic
1/2 cup of sliced mushrooms
2 cups of frozen corn
2 cups of macaroni noodles
Chili powder
Crushed Red Pepper (USE CAREFULLY! HOT!)
Cumin
Onion powder
Garlic powder
Salt
Pepper
Sugar

Directions:

Brown and drain hamburger

Put drained hamburger, diced onions and peppers, chili packets and garlic in with the diced tomatoes.  Simmer these ingredients together until the onions and peppers are soft and cooked through.

Then add beans, mushrooms and corn. Mix well and let it simmer again for a few minutes.

Now add water, enough to cover the top of all the ingredients by a few inches.

The next part is all "to taste".  I usually add more Cumin, onion and garlic powder, salt, pepper - and yes, even sugar.

When the broth / stuff ratio and the flavor of the broth is to your liking, then simmer on low for as many hours as you have available to you.  The longer it cooks at this stage the better the flavors blend.

About 20 minutes before serving add a few handfuls of macaroni into the pot. It helps it to go farther, fills you up longer.

Any leftovers freeze really well.

Nutrition Information:

Recipe name

Serves people
IngredientsCaloriesCarbsFatProtein
80/20 Ground Chuck - Hamburger, 3 container (16 oz.(112g) ea.)3,4800264252Ico_delete
Brooks - Chili Beans ; Red Beans In Mild Chili Sauce, 1 container (3 1/2 cups ea.)91016140Ico_delete
Onions - Raw, 2 medium (2-1/2" dia)922202Ico_delete
Fresh Produce - Green Bell Pepper (Comp), 1 med (149g)30701Ico_delete
Aldi Dakota's Pride - Kidney Beans-Light Red, 1 container (1 4/5 cups ea.)52595235Ico_delete
Kroger - Canned Black Beans, 1 container (1 4/5 cup (130g) ea.)38567425Ico_delete
Mccormic - Chili Seasoning Packet, 2 packet1202024Ico_delete
Great Value - Diced Tomatoes and Green Chilies, 1 container (1 3/10 cups ea.)501000Ico_delete
Great Value - Fire Roasted Tex Mex Style Diced Tomatoes, 1 container (1 4/5 cups ea.)1402807Ico_delete
Gilroy Farms - Minced Garlic In Water, 2 tsp10200Ico_delete
Great Value - Sliced Mushrooms, 1 container (1 cup (115g) ea.)60804Ico_delete
Kroger - Frozen Fresh Golden Sweet Corn, 2 Cup3006339Ico_delete
Generic - Elbow Macaroni Cooked, 2 cup (140g)44286316Ico_delete
Kroger - Chili Powder Seasoning, 1 tsp0000Ico_delete
Generic - Ground Cumin, 0.5 Tablespoon11211Ico_delete
Kroger - Pure Onion Powder, 1 tsp (2.4 g)8200Ico_delete
Spices - Garlic Powder, 1 tbsp (8g)27611Ico_delete
Generic - Sugar, 6 tsp level902400Ico_delete
Add Ingredient
Total:6680603284357
Per Serving:22320912

Friday, December 09, 2011

As writing excuses go...

Okay, I admit it.  I've been slacking off on the novel this week.  I finished Nano's 50 thousand words and then I let it sit. 

Instead I've been sprucing up my blog.  I added widgets for tracking my works in progress, I created a few pages, and today I added a Goodreads gadget and I created a new logo picture. *points up*  See?  I stood in front of the mirror with the camera, white door behind me and took several pictures.  (In related news, make sure you've turned the flash off before you do this at home... unless you are going for the whole white-out, solar-flare thing as a fun special effect)  Then I loaded them into my computer and chose the one I wanted.  Then I opened it in Picasa3, a free image editing software made by Google, and cropped it and filtered it into a sepia tone.  Then I added my text with the text editor and played with the font, color and sizing till I had what I liked.  Then I saved it as a jpeg file and uploaded it.  Viola!

So... now that I've had fun decorating my playground, I'll get back to work on the novel.  Which was really what I was going to talk to you about today. 

When Nano ended I'd come to the natural breaking point in the story where it changes location and another character gets introduced.  My problem is that while I'd sketched her out, I'd not fleshed her in very well.  Now that I need her to be onstage, so to speak, I realized I hadn't done a good job of making her real to me yet.  The thing is, she's very real to my characters.  She's the one responsible, through her decisions from the back story, that changed the lives of all my main characters.

I've been using this down time to figure out how I want to present her.  Is she hard and bitter, full of revenge or charismatic and protective - not a selfish character, but one misguided through grief?  Once I lock her in and really have her in my head, there's no going back and it will set the tone of the last half of the novel.  I want her to be a vibrant character, but I admit that I'm worried that I've given her too much power over my other characters and she'll try to derail me too once she's alive on paper.  I know that sounds silly.  But silly or not, I've stopped to roll up my sleeves and grab oven mitts before I handle her.

Wish me luck!

Wednesday, December 07, 2011

In which I go all fan-girl...

I'm going to go all fan-girl on you for a moment.  If you don't like Jim Butcher or James Marsden, or the Dresden files... well then, drive on by. 

I'm currently listening to the Dresden Files on MP3.  Our local library lets you download audio books through a site called Destination Download, and using a software I downloaded first called Overdrive, it stores and transfers your selections.  It also has a timer on it that allows you borrow the copy for 7 to 14 days.  Then it expires.

Anyway, now that all the connections, links and acknowledgements are done I just want to say:  The audio version of the books that I have loved for years actually make it possible to love it fresh all over again.  How often do you get to do that?  How often do you get to love the same thing twice for the first time

Jim Butcher does an amazing job telling a good tale.  I actually had to erase half of this paragraph because it just got too gushy... which derails me from getting to the point, and just makes me sound like a groupie.  Which I would be if that were possible in this media.  It's embarrassing.

James Marsters is an actor with a tremendous range for voices and accents.  Most of you will remember him as the character Spike, from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.   (As an aside, Joss Wheden is brilliant not only for his own works but also for his casting ability.)  You can close your eyes and let the action play inside your mind just like it were a movie.  It's that good.  Seriously.  All it's missing is the sound effects. 

Anyway, I've had Jim's words and James's voice in my ear for the last few days.  And it's been fun.  It keeps me motivated, keeps me company.  If I had money to spare, and not money that was already earmarked for things like a new roof, saving for my girls college, for the next car repair etc... I would totally buy this whole set and have it for my own,... well, for keeps. 

As it is, I have the next one in the series on hold at the library and will wait for it to become available.

In a perfect world, Joss would get the movie options to produce the Dresden novels as individual movies.  Or, failing that, a reboot of the series.  (There was a short-lived version of it out there for a while...  but they didn't follow the books really closely, they took the ideas, the character names and the concepts but went in their own direction.) 

You don't know about the Dresden series?  Oh how lucky you are!  And you don't even know it.  Why?  Because you, dear friend, if you allow your curiosity to lead you into that fey-ridden Chicago underworld, will get to discover it fresh ...

For the very first time. 

Yeah... it's that good.

Tuesday, December 06, 2011

Dea's Broccoli Cheese Soup

Broccoli Cheese Soup

This is a basic place to start your soup, each time you make it, the ingredients will change according to what you have on hand, if you are adapting it to meet the needs of diet restrictions, or what ever.

List of ingredients:
12 cups of water
4 chicken bullion cubes
2 tbs of french onion soup mix
1 diced onion
1 tbs of minced garlic
2 diced celery stalks
2 diced carrot sticks
2 fresh broccoli stalks
1/4 cup of diced mushrooms
4 peeled and diced potatoes
2 cups of diced ham
1 can of cream of broccoli soup
1 can of potato soup
1 can of cream of corn
2 cups of colby/jack shredded cheese
6 slices of American cheese
1/2 bag of frozen broccoli
8 tsp of sugar
1 tbs of butter
salt
pepper

Directions:
Start the 12 cups of water boiling
Add chicken bullion and french onion mix
Add garlic, onion and celery
While that's boiling on high, add the potatoes, mushrooms, frozen broccoli and carrots
Next add all the canned soups and cream corn
Then add the sliced and shredded cheese (this thickens the broth)
Season the broth with the sugar, butter, salt and pepper to taste
Let simmer all day
About a half hour before serving, add the fresh broccoli, it will brighten as it's cooking and add some firmness.



Here is a break down of the ingredients and their nutritional values:
Recipe name
Serves people
IngredientsCaloriesCarbsFatProtein
Generic - Chicken Bullion, 4 Cube32404Ico_delete
Lipton - French Onion Soup Mix, 42 grams140832Ico_delete
Heb - Diced White Onions, 1 1/2 cup501402Ico_delete
Gilroy Farms - Minced Garlic In Water, 3 tsp15300Ico_delete
Celery - 1 Large Stalk 11-12 Inches Long, 2 Large 1in stalk20400Ico_delete
Potatoes - Boiled, cooked without skin, flesh, without salt, 4 large (3" to 4-1/4" dia.)1,032240121Ico_delete
Carrot - Large - Raw, 2 large601402Ico_delete
Generic - White Mushrooms, Raw, 0.25 Cup4101Ico_delete
Cambell's - Broccoli Cheese Soup, 1 container (1 3/10 cups ea.)25030115Ico_delete
Campbell's - Cream of Potato Soup Less Sodium, 1 container (1 3/10 cups ea.)2253855Ico_delete
Aldi Happy Harvest - Cream Style Corn, 1 container (1 4/5 cups ea.)3157007Ico_delete
Kroger - Cubed Ham, 1 container (2 cup (57g) ea.)2408636Ico_delete
Generic - Kroger Value Frozen Broccoli Cuts, 0.5 container (10 cups ea.)15020010Ico_delete
Broccoli - Fresh Raw - Vegetable, 2 Stalk (151.0g) appx 1/4 Head1022028Ico_delete
Crystal Farms - American Cheese Singles (Slices), 0.5 container (12 slices ea.)42062424Ico_delete
Aldi Happy Farms - Finely Shredded Colby and Monterey Jack Cheese, 0.5 container (4 cups ea.)66065442Ico_delete
Domino - Sugar, 8 tspn1203200Ico_delete
Butter - Salted, 1 tbsp1020120Ico_delete
Spices - Salt, table, 1 tbsp0000Ico_delete
Add Ingredient
Total:3937518118169
Per Serving:131174
6